We have been blessed with a love that some people have never known or will.
We have found in one another a connection of energies like electricity and chemistry making magic absolutely real.
You are my blessing and sometimes a curse because the love is all consuming that the thought of not being able to grow and evolve with you in my life by my side leaves this aching that feels like death would be easier.
But your love saves me in one touch one embrace, one kiss, a whisper, your voice, your presence alone saves my soul and sets me free from the imprisoning thoughts we have been taught since birth.
You set me free and show me how limitless life can be in your heart. I love you unlike many or even any have ever felt , seen or known.
It is like the greatest love the universe has ever felt. Encountering you this incarnation has changed the soul of the earth. This love has brought a life of beauty to the core of the earth and shall live in it for lifetimes to come. My soul mate... I love you.
Friday, September 28, 2012
I can't say I blame her from blocking me but I hate her for it... I no connection to u now but through faith an the moon. Imagining somehow that you love me so much that every piece of any part of the world carries it. I am going to miss you and hope I don't die from a broken heart while you are away.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
If you --
If you want to save what you have -- just say the word and I will take all the blame and be the one that contacted you and been the one that asked you to talk to me and be in my life and you were only a friend that I overstepped boundaries and convos with ok?
you can count on me
Find out what we are made of...
You can count on me like 1-2-3
I'll be there.....and I know I need it I can count on you like 4-3-2
You'll be there....
Missing you already -- knowing you had to go home to big shit poppin
But I love you and -------------- hope that you know that -
And I guess in love real love if next to me is not where you want to be I will have to set you free
But I am putting magical dust into the atmosphere that you will be with me when you return from down south and spend your days and nights with me to explore our past incarnation and make sense of what we have become and make our final decision in our days and nights together...intimately, magically, connected physically and face to face - looking into our souls of one another...and give ourself a good amount of time together (not limited) to explore our love and possibilities and determine our future.
Please say you will --- please make it happen Lobe
(side note: LIMITED - IT WAS LIMITED)
You can count on me like 1-2-3
I'll be there.....and I know I need it I can count on you like 4-3-2
You'll be there....
Missing you already -- knowing you had to go home to big shit poppin
But I love you and -------------- hope that you know that -
And I guess in love real love if next to me is not where you want to be I will have to set you free
But I am putting magical dust into the atmosphere that you will be with me when you return from down south and spend your days and nights with me to explore our past incarnation and make sense of what we have become and make our final decision in our days and nights together...intimately, magically, connected physically and face to face - looking into our souls of one another...and give ourself a good amount of time together (not limited) to explore our love and possibilities and determine our future.
Please say you will --- please make it happen Lobe
(side note: LIMITED - IT WAS LIMITED)
Right now
Right now I dont doubt your love more than ever...
Not sure if thats you loving me and I can feel your soul in me
Or if I am trying to convince myself to put the blindfold on to an impending heartbreak
But I love you and believe in us now and more thatn ever putting my faith into the Universe.
This is not for nothing...it is for something extraordinary something magical, something beyond love
it is what love is made from absolute in its purest form
Love love love you --
Not sure if thats you loving me and I can feel your soul in me
Or if I am trying to convince myself to put the blindfold on to an impending heartbreak
But I love you and believe in us now and more thatn ever putting my faith into the Universe.
This is not for nothing...it is for something extraordinary something magical, something beyond love
it is what love is made from absolute in its purest form
Love love love you --
Seriously
This is a fucking nightmare - waiting to hear from you ==
I really hope you havent changed your mind and will be with me in a couple weeks.
I feel like I need those days and nights with you I need to wake up with you, I need to sleep by your side and then and only then will I set you free to do what you need to do to return to me...I dream
(side note: you arent going anywhere....you have always known that and used me to fill you up in a way she cant - but you return to her because she fills you more than I can)
I really hope you havent changed your mind and will be with me in a couple weeks.
I feel like I need those days and nights with you I need to wake up with you, I need to sleep by your side and then and only then will I set you free to do what you need to do to return to me...I dream
(side note: you arent going anywhere....you have always known that and used me to fill you up in a way she cant - but you return to her because she fills you more than I can)
Remember
Click the link -- love love love
Lets go back to the start - you and I - 8 years...and here we are again....'
We can be all we ever dreamed of being my soul mate....
http://youtu.be/EqWLpTKBFcU
"The Scientist"
Lets go back to the start - you and I - 8 years...and here we are again....'
We can be all we ever dreamed of being my soul mate....
http://youtu.be/EqWLpTKBFcU
"The Scientist"
Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming in tails
Heads on a science apart
Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Oh, take me back to the start.
I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling the puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart
And tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are
Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start
Ooooohhhhhhh [x4]
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming in tails
Heads on a science apart
Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Oh, take me back to the start.
I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling the puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart
And tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are
Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start
Ooooohhhhhhh [x4]
Only Connection Right Now
This is my only connection to you -- I cant imagine that our October is not going to happen..make it happen PLEASE! 5 days - I love you and need you
(fucking joke)
(fucking joke)
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Challenge
Maybe this is a challenge and once obtained...no longer desired?
Maybe - maybe Not!
I want you anyway....
Maybe - maybe Not!
I want you anyway....
Friday, September 21, 2012
You see me... I dream
I imagine you see me in things, objects, songs, trees, skies and life alike while away from my body.
I see you as well in most all things with soul.
Your voice rings in my ear and I imagine your eyes, looking at me with a sense of pure love even in my thoughts of perversion or melancholy.
You love me in my dreams like a gift of redemption from the heavens above.
I miss your body on my skin,your lips on my ear lobe your breath on my neck your teeth on my shoulder clenching down in my skin with a breath inhaling my scent.
I love you loving me and I long to love you more in the time we have in this life.
Our fingers intertwine like the threads of our souls and I know that we will always be so connected
Even in the cold dark nights of solitude.
I love you now and forever until the stars all fall from the sky and the oceans dry up and all the universe becomes nothing but a single grain of sand
...and even then in the atoms of that grain of sand the electrons and protons and that form to create that matter in the nucleus of that grain, you will still see that in the molecular part that is left of Heaven and Earth, my love resides in that place for you.
I see you as well in most all things with soul.
Your voice rings in my ear and I imagine your eyes, looking at me with a sense of pure love even in my thoughts of perversion or melancholy.
You love me in my dreams like a gift of redemption from the heavens above.
I miss your body on my skin,your lips on my ear lobe your breath on my neck your teeth on my shoulder clenching down in my skin with a breath inhaling my scent.
I love you loving me and I long to love you more in the time we have in this life.
Our fingers intertwine like the threads of our souls and I know that we will always be so connected
Even in the cold dark nights of solitude.
I love you now and forever until the stars all fall from the sky and the oceans dry up and all the universe becomes nothing but a single grain of sand
...and even then in the atoms of that grain of sand the electrons and protons and that form to create that matter in the nucleus of that grain, you will still see that in the molecular part that is left of Heaven and Earth, my love resides in that place for you.
Day 1
3pm and the first year fell ... Watching a love story movie and missing you. I want to be your girlfriend lover best friend and partner in life. You are such a beautiful part of me who makes me see the beautiful parts of me... If that makes any sense. When you give me love I feel like there is no other place i would rather be but in your eyes of love who hold me safe in your souls purpose, which I then can see my souls purpose. We have become one that I believe in.
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Love everlasting
I love you - in my frustration, distance, sadness, darkness, light, rainbows, rain, sunshine and madness...
Our loves will unite and we will dance in the magic stardust that shows us that through all this - it's worth the time we are enduring.
Love everlasting - you and me the place and time to show the world that it is more than possible it is absolute love that exists in this universe and lives even in our current distance.
Keep the Faith Penguin
Our loves will unite and we will dance in the magic stardust that shows us that through all this - it's worth the time we are enduring.
Love everlasting - you and me the place and time to show the world that it is more than possible it is absolute love that exists in this universe and lives even in our current distance.
Keep the Faith Penguin
givin up
You give up on me
Just like that
Just like me - givin up on you
and I cry and beat myself
and hopefully you wont recognize me when you are done taking me for granted
because when you were busy givin up on me I will turn into someone that you can never have and you will desire more than ener
Just like that
Just like me - givin up on you
and I cry and beat myself
and hopefully you wont recognize me when you are done taking me for granted
because when you were busy givin up on me I will turn into someone that you can never have and you will desire more than ener
Monday, September 17, 2012
dont
Do NOT Say You love me SHOW IT
I just dont think i can do this anymore..............
ILY
but today we separate..
I need this because I need you and this need for you has been greater than my need to be ok with out you...
And knowing that you are struggling and I am not able to be there in the light I can be, because I spend most of my times chasing and being frustrated that this love I want to give is not able to go inside you because of your inability to grasp it ...I am not being the love you need.
And I must go....to salvage whatever this is.
I just dont think i can do this anymore..............
ILY
but today we separate..
I need this because I need you and this need for you has been greater than my need to be ok with out you...
And knowing that you are struggling and I am not able to be there in the light I can be, because I spend most of my times chasing and being frustrated that this love I want to give is not able to go inside you because of your inability to grasp it ...I am not being the love you need.
And I must go....to salvage whatever this is.
Maybe Not
From the music to poetry - waiting for you to call...staring at my phone for a simple hello text, somehow tells me you love me because you are thinking of me...
Hoping you will listen to the compilations I have made for you to show you the music in my mind when I dream of you ....the light of love in me...
And as time passes maybe it was all in vain...maybe a moot point....maybe, just maybe to remind me who I am and who I am not...and how to live in love and and tell the difference between fantasy and truth.
Any maybe it was for a purpose...maybe not.
Maybe not
Yeah...maybe not for anything.
Hoping you will listen to the compilations I have made for you to show you the music in my mind when I dream of you ....the light of love in me...
And as time passes maybe it was all in vain...maybe a moot point....maybe, just maybe to remind me who I am and who I am not...and how to live in love and and tell the difference between fantasy and truth.
Any maybe it was for a purpose...maybe not.
Maybe not
Yeah...maybe not for anything.
Love is---------
Love is everlasting and eternal
That is the love I have for you - but at what cost?
The cost of my sanity...always rotating my life and schedule and existence to accomodate the little tiny moments that you so graciously make for me...(note sarcasm)
I am sure that the intent is good but my heart is suffering
This predicament is only my own doing and you are not to blame
Putting stock in something out of my control - is a gamble
I am a gambling one...but right now, waiting on your love to set me free - is really the chains that are binding me
You say let our love run wild and it is not something we can control
But you have a love for me that is controlled and limited, as mine will cross the atmosphere and move mountains and runs limitless to meet you where you may roam
In this love I am alone in my madness and I can only go so far on this journey - if I cant see you meeting me halfway.
Love is eternal and I know you know that my love has been in the cells of my being from the beginning of time.
I feel malnourished and I need to feed myself and not wait for your love to save me anymore.
Because you are incapable of giving what it is I need...halfway is a long walk for you - you are too weary and tired and I cant see you...you need to sleep and rest and I need to respect that.
But that does not mean that in your resting state that I need to continue walking to your bed...who knows if true loves kiss would awaken you...
I imagine not, as it has yet to in a thousand years.
Maybe next life.
That is the love I have for you - but at what cost?
The cost of my sanity...always rotating my life and schedule and existence to accomodate the little tiny moments that you so graciously make for me...(note sarcasm)
I am sure that the intent is good but my heart is suffering
This predicament is only my own doing and you are not to blame
Putting stock in something out of my control - is a gamble
I am a gambling one...but right now, waiting on your love to set me free - is really the chains that are binding me
You say let our love run wild and it is not something we can control
But you have a love for me that is controlled and limited, as mine will cross the atmosphere and move mountains and runs limitless to meet you where you may roam
In this love I am alone in my madness and I can only go so far on this journey - if I cant see you meeting me halfway.
Love is eternal and I know you know that my love has been in the cells of my being from the beginning of time.
I feel malnourished and I need to feed myself and not wait for your love to save me anymore.
Because you are incapable of giving what it is I need...halfway is a long walk for you - you are too weary and tired and I cant see you...you need to sleep and rest and I need to respect that.
But that does not mean that in your resting state that I need to continue walking to your bed...who knows if true loves kiss would awaken you...
I imagine not, as it has yet to in a thousand years.
Maybe next life.
Whatever this is....
So foolish...
So foolish
To care and let you consume me
I want to zap that part of my brain...and let it all go
For now it is too powerful that I am borderline obsessive and I feel like I am in this alone
So foolish
To care and let you consume me
I want to zap that part of my brain...and let it all go
For now it is too powerful that I am borderline obsessive and I feel like I am in this alone
I know that this is becoming more complicated.
I am in his presence and his acceptance of me ...and his professing of his love hurts me at times.
I wonder how is it that I could be so cold and betray him in such a way as I have.
My love for you is great and I am torn when I look at my son and I never want to hurt him.
What is this to be?
How am I to be?
I am in love and sad that to be in love I will hurt so many.
I am in his presence and his acceptance of me ...and his professing of his love hurts me at times.
I wonder how is it that I could be so cold and betray him in such a way as I have.
My love for you is great and I am torn when I look at my son and I never want to hurt him.
What is this to be?
How am I to be?
I am in love and sad that to be in love I will hurt so many.
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Plan
Here's the situation
I want my my free moments with you
Honestly any minute I have that I can be or talk to you I want it and will take it
I think I take my minutes to myself...when I am home...and if could be with you all the time right now I would
I know honestly you have a lot going on ---
I am trying to be understanding but your "I'll call you right back" with a " I will talk to you tomorrow" instead it dissapoints me
I am frustrated with this affair
As I once said to Jason and from my favorite movie - I cant love you enough for the both of us...
As much as I love you I cant feel like I am more in this than you ...
And right now I feel that I am in 110% every chance or moment I can be --
I dont know what to do---- I want to see you - I miss you and hope to see you tomorrow...but then my love...we have to separate for 30...
Test our love and desire and prove to ourselves that this is what we are willing to sacrifice our current lives for....
I love you and I believe in us...but only the distance and space truly will prove it for both of us.
I hope our heart culdesac is complete and we meet in love absolute
and what we believe to be true - is!
in 30
Still planning October days and nights with you...but if something changes -- please let me know.
ILYA
-CH
I want my my free moments with you
Honestly any minute I have that I can be or talk to you I want it and will take it
I think I take my minutes to myself...when I am home...and if could be with you all the time right now I would
I know honestly you have a lot going on ---
I am trying to be understanding but your "I'll call you right back" with a " I will talk to you tomorrow" instead it dissapoints me
I am frustrated with this affair
As I once said to Jason and from my favorite movie - I cant love you enough for the both of us...
As much as I love you I cant feel like I am more in this than you ...
And right now I feel that I am in 110% every chance or moment I can be --
I dont know what to do---- I want to see you - I miss you and hope to see you tomorrow...but then my love...we have to separate for 30...
Test our love and desire and prove to ourselves that this is what we are willing to sacrifice our current lives for....
I love you and I believe in us...but only the distance and space truly will prove it for both of us.
I hope our heart culdesac is complete and we meet in love absolute
and what we believe to be true - is!
in 30
Still planning October days and nights with you...but if something changes -- please let me know.
ILYA
-CH
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
I love you
I love you from the core of my soul and being - I love you so much I am destroying it as to not ever let it destroy me.
When I am without you I die a little more every second.
So better to kill it then to let it ever kill me right?
I dont know if I believe that, but I do know that I tend to self destruct and corrupt as to save my ego...because I cant be hurt again, so I have always done that...I need to change I know.
But it is hard to grow from this and allow this love to become more powerful than me, let it control all I have become...
I became a person that is strong and exists in a place with mindful existence, a person that doesnt let their heart control their head..a person who is rational, a person who knows that love like fairytales are for the dreamers.
No but who I am is a dreamer - I always have been and you have brought me back to this place,my authentic self, the lover, the dreamer, the believer, the drifter, the poet...And I am scared....I am scared because everything I worked to become is not who I really am and not who I was meant to be...and I am vulnerable and in love, like I haven't been in love for many years.
I am destroying something beautiful and magical because you brought me back to life and I am afraid to live like this..because when I live like this I have to feel everything and in every passion there are tears being shed...and the highs are so magnificent that the lows can make you bleed...but to bleed means that you are alive...I am alive again...and afraid.
But know that I love you soooo much
you are a blessing and a curse...my blessing is... you have awoken me and my curse is...you have awoken me.
I love you and I will forever be greatful soulfully although outwardly and from my egotistical point of view I am angry ...because I am in a position to fall from cloud nince and I dont want to be so weak.
Thank you for giving me the gift of passionately feeling within and inspiring me to come from within ....that I can write from my heart - the heart that once was black is now beating passionately and deeply and crazy. I am alive -- yes alive.
When I am without you I die a little more every second.
So better to kill it then to let it ever kill me right?
I dont know if I believe that, but I do know that I tend to self destruct and corrupt as to save my ego...because I cant be hurt again, so I have always done that...I need to change I know.
But it is hard to grow from this and allow this love to become more powerful than me, let it control all I have become...
I became a person that is strong and exists in a place with mindful existence, a person that doesnt let their heart control their head..a person who is rational, a person who knows that love like fairytales are for the dreamers.
No but who I am is a dreamer - I always have been and you have brought me back to this place,my authentic self, the lover, the dreamer, the believer, the drifter, the poet...And I am scared....I am scared because everything I worked to become is not who I really am and not who I was meant to be...and I am vulnerable and in love, like I haven't been in love for many years.
I am destroying something beautiful and magical because you brought me back to life and I am afraid to live like this..because when I live like this I have to feel everything and in every passion there are tears being shed...and the highs are so magnificent that the lows can make you bleed...but to bleed means that you are alive...I am alive again...and afraid.
But know that I love you soooo much
you are a blessing and a curse...my blessing is... you have awoken me and my curse is...you have awoken me.
I love you and I will forever be greatful soulfully although outwardly and from my egotistical point of view I am angry ...because I am in a position to fall from cloud nince and I dont want to be so weak.
Thank you for giving me the gift of passionately feeling within and inspiring me to come from within ....that I can write from my heart - the heart that once was black is now beating passionately and deeply and crazy. I am alive -- yes alive.
Illusion
Sometimes I feel like I am a big game to you
...waiting for you to care
...waiting for you to call
...waiting for you to play ,return the ball to me, as I wait in the court with my tennis racket in hand like a lonely girl in a skirt, sun beating down on me
...and I am sweating so much you cant see my tears.
The waiting is so painful but wondering if you even care is worse,
....because if you cared I wouldnt have to wait on you endlessly.
Longing for you, as you go home to your life and tell her that you love her....I try to believe you dont and you really only love me...I am torturing myself.
Its as if your words are my savior and my sword...they save me in the day but at night the words carve into my soul and heart and I bleed from the inside out and hope that in the morning you can bandage me with your words so magical, but like magic it is an illusion and I bleed again.
...waiting for you to care
...waiting for you to call
...waiting for you to play ,return the ball to me, as I wait in the court with my tennis racket in hand like a lonely girl in a skirt, sun beating down on me
...and I am sweating so much you cant see my tears.
The waiting is so painful but wondering if you even care is worse,
....because if you cared I wouldnt have to wait on you endlessly.
Longing for you, as you go home to your life and tell her that you love her....I try to believe you dont and you really only love me...I am torturing myself.
Its as if your words are my savior and my sword...they save me in the day but at night the words carve into my soul and heart and I bleed from the inside out and hope that in the morning you can bandage me with your words so magical, but like magic it is an illusion and I bleed again.
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Monday, September 10, 2012
did u see?
Oh yeah did you see the posts back n forth between Jen and I?
I asked her why she unfriended me and she said she didnt she thought I did....wonder if your girl broke in her FB and unfriended me...LOL
just kiddin'
Miss you like crazy and I love you more than words
My universe will never be the same.
I love you penguin...I love you!
I asked her why she unfriended me and she said she didnt she thought I did....wonder if your girl broke in her FB and unfriended me...LOL
just kiddin'
Miss you like crazy and I love you more than words
My universe will never be the same.
I love you penguin...I love you!
Saturday, September 8, 2012
Sad
I am sad
Melancholy
This life I have built is missing something
2people in love
I am in love with the one who does not share my bed but holds my heart and consumes my head
I love yOu and miss you by my side although you live in me
Melancholy
This life I have built is missing something
2people in love
I am in love with the one who does not share my bed but holds my heart and consumes my head
I love yOu and miss you by my side although you live in me
No need to respond... But IFMY
After connecting with your soul eyes interlocked with mine in a tunnel of lovision I miss you so much. So trying to figure the how and I should only worry about the now. You are my love And I wanto live in your eyes heart for as long as we live I want you for the rest of my days after our distance e and being in your arms again I know that's where we belong ... Together in love infinite love and soulmates reunited to change the world and show the world that love like this is not just for fairytales my prince charming one kiss and I am a princess kao!!
Thursday, September 6, 2012
That Precise Moment
...........when a song comes on the radio that sings everything from your own heart and you know your love is real...
MAGIC
MAGIC
Broken Glasses
Rose colored glass surrounded my eyes.....glasses are broken
I should have learned ---- better late than never.
I should have learned ---- better late than never.
Empty
I cant love you like this
From a distance and pure heart
Believing you wont call when you say that you wont...you call
Belieiving you will call when you say that you will...you dont
Waiting
Repeating patterns of self masochism...abusing my own soul for a heart that is not invested in me truly
The investment is for validation and recognition - the void is filled and I am left empty waiting again for your "love" to save me.
From a distance and pure heart
Believing you wont call when you say that you wont...you call
Belieiving you will call when you say that you will...you dont
Waiting
Repeating patterns of self masochism...abusing my own soul for a heart that is not invested in me truly
The investment is for validation and recognition - the void is filled and I am left empty waiting again for your "love" to save me.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
TL
Love that you love me
I see that this space between the tears we cry is the river that will lead us back to one another soon
Love love love
True Love
Our love story
Our happiness begins with you and I
Journey through the absolute culdesac our two hearts become one my soul mate
I love you beyond words
I see that this space between the tears we cry is the river that will lead us back to one another soon
Love love love
True Love
Our love story
Our happiness begins with you and I
Journey through the absolute culdesac our two hearts become one my soul mate
I love you beyond words
IFMY!
IFMY and learning to live with this
One call and now I have fallen to weakness.................
Lord please redeem me
One call and now I have fallen to weakness.................
Lord please redeem me
Rehab - Fail
Talking to you today is like checking out of rehab and getting a shot of heroin
I want more again and more right now and now I need to go through the detox process again to feel ok
Not only hearing your voice, but now I need to see you, I need to feel you
My heart, my soul, my life depends on it.
25 days and counting.....my love will go on and on and I long for you my love.
I want more again and more right now and now I need to go through the detox process again to feel ok
Not only hearing your voice, but now I need to see you, I need to feel you
My heart, my soul, my life depends on it.
25 days and counting.....my love will go on and on and I long for you my love.
Be Strong
Its going to get worse before it gets better...
You can't tell me you hate yourself and then not respond to me
I am worried about you ---
During this space and time between us...find the light in you that shines in me
Love yourself as I love you
So that when we reunite our beauty will shine to the univers of what absolute is... and prove to the world that the beauty that resides in us from past lifetimes that brought us together now is truly what love stories are born from and why love songs are written
I love you my penguin...love yourself....and know that the love we have is true magic
Be strong my lobe --
love love love
always -
You can't tell me you hate yourself and then not respond to me
I am worried about you ---
During this space and time between us...find the light in you that shines in me
Love yourself as I love you
So that when we reunite our beauty will shine to the univers of what absolute is... and prove to the world that the beauty that resides in us from past lifetimes that brought us together now is truly what love stories are born from and why love songs are written
I love you my penguin...love yourself....and know that the love we have is true magic
Be strong my lobe --
love love love
always -
Strength
I have been tested and tried throughout my life
As a girlfriend, a friend, a mother a wife
Lost some loves a long the way
Some patience tested from day to day
Another test upon me in this place where I roam
Defending my position of what I deem as my home
I live in a place that holds my bed
But there is another place in which my heart has been led
I love another although it is not known for the masses
People seem to say I see through rose colored glasses
But this love and soul is filled more than ever before
The absolute love straight to my core
For now I must be strong and have faith it is real
And be strong that this distance in my soul it wont kill
The day will be coming that our fate will unfold
Until that day, your love I still hold
As a girlfriend, a friend, a mother a wife
Lost some loves a long the way
Some patience tested from day to day
Another test upon me in this place where I roam
Defending my position of what I deem as my home
I live in a place that holds my bed
But there is another place in which my heart has been led
I love another although it is not known for the masses
People seem to say I see through rose colored glasses
But this love and soul is filled more than ever before
The absolute love straight to my core
For now I must be strong and have faith it is real
And be strong that this distance in my soul it wont kill
The day will be coming that our fate will unfold
Until that day, your love I still hold
Waiting....
Waiting...to see if you are online - it is your break time...and I am waiting to see if you are viewing what I have written as I am writing...
How I miss you == How I love you still === How I know I always will
How I miss you == How I love you still === How I know I always will
No Contact?
Is this blog really considered no contact? Please tell me that this still counts and you arent going to tell me that we are still communicating therefore you are unable to make a decision in 25 days...Oh how I wish I could hibernate until then...time is not my friend without hearing your beautiful voice and feeling your soul thru your eyes --
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Pondering
I am feeling sick sore throat tired
I miss him today ... But know that I can't call or Facebook text or anything else. I
Love is love ... But is it in the face of betrayal? I once heard a saying that said betrayal of oneself is the ultimate betrayal and I suppose in the midst of my justification of this love affair I suppose I have believed that to be the truth.
I want to go back on vacation and move far away from here.
My heart is sad in this town without him and starting a new I feel may be my only survival and determining who I really am authentically.
I miss him today ... But know that I can't call or Facebook text or anything else. I
Love is love ... But is it in the face of betrayal? I once heard a saying that said betrayal of oneself is the ultimate betrayal and I suppose in the midst of my justification of this love affair I suppose I have believed that to be the truth.
I want to go back on vacation and move far away from here.
My heart is sad in this town without him and starting a new I feel may be my only survival and determining who I really am authentically.
Sunday, September 2, 2012
SM forever
How are you feeling ?
You missin me?
Loving me?
Changing your mind about me?
Had a dream that she knew all about me and you confessed to one time.
Tell me what's goin on?
Did u read my fb situation all I can see is comments u put on other peoples pics otherwise I can't see your status... Can u see mine? Have you looked ?
All my thoughts of the minds in me.... Getting to see that I am ok... I know I will be good on my own... As long as I am surrounded by loving friends and family... I don't want to go home ... Really I love where I am now and who I am with...
A change is coming again in me. I haven't had a drink or one cocktail since thursday ... And I only had one glass of wine on thursday anf i actually have had a better time than i have in a long laughing ... Hoping that i can be as at peace as I am now when I return home
You missin me?
Loving me?
Changing your mind about me?
Had a dream that she knew all about me and you confessed to one time.
Tell me what's goin on?
Did u read my fb situation all I can see is comments u put on other peoples pics otherwise I can't see your status... Can u see mine? Have you looked ?
All my thoughts of the minds in me.... Getting to see that I am ok... I know I will be good on my own... As long as I am surrounded by loving friends and family... I don't want to go home ... Really I love where I am now and who I am with...
A change is coming again in me. I haven't had a drink or one cocktail since thursday ... And I only had one glass of wine on thursday anf i actually have had a better time than i have in a long laughing ... Hoping that i can be as at peace as I am now when I return home
Thoughts
Love is the answer for most of the questions in my mind.
And if the moon can change tides it can take the tears from
My eyes and turn them
Into monsoons
It's easier today than yesterday and easier than the day before but sure that when I return home to my life and routine and you are not my morning call my afternoon kiss the arms that wrap around me in the still of the night I may feel my heart breaking again and there may be nothing left upon your return
Which may be my defense mechanism and save me from
Ever being so vulnerable again... And then I can live like so many do.... Surfacely living contently but not necessarily live in love as I am with you
And if the moon can change tides it can take the tears from
My eyes and turn them
Into monsoons
It's easier today than yesterday and easier than the day before but sure that when I return home to my life and routine and you are not my morning call my afternoon kiss the arms that wrap around me in the still of the night I may feel my heart breaking again and there may be nothing left upon your return
Which may be my defense mechanism and save me from
Ever being so vulnerable again... And then I can live like so many do.... Surfacely living contently but not necessarily live in love as I am with you
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Oh ya check again uh huh
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Check your Facebook settings
I still can't see you!!!!!!
(she set your settings under me.. Which you can click on me and add me as a friend family close friend etc..,and then additional settings which says what I am allowed to see such as updates,pics,comments or likes n dislikes...allow allllllllllll)
Sneeaaaaakkkkyyy
But I too am crafty lol
Having a greaaaaaattt time lmao with my BFF and loving Utah
Ilypenguin
Violets are blue
Check your Facebook settings
I still can't see you!!!!!!
(she set your settings under me.. Which you can click on me and add me as a friend family close friend etc..,and then additional settings which says what I am allowed to see such as updates,pics,comments or likes n dislikes...allow allllllllllll)
Sneeaaaaakkkkyyy
But I too am crafty lol
Having a greaaaaaattt time lmao with my BFF and loving Utah
Ilypenguin
Facebook restricted still really?
Really you can't unrestrict me from your Facebook that's lame lame lame unless of course you don't want me seeing you faking it til you make it or are you not? Hmmm
Ily hope you are missin me 2
Ily hope you are missin me 2
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